The moment that a psychological fear — not necessarily threatening physical harm — occurs, simply be the fear, without merely looking at it with (and “from”) separation. Do not (as you learned from the past) merely try to avoid it, or rationalize it, analyze it, judge it, condemn it, or wish it was not happening. Simply be what it is without some (supposed) center looking at it from a (supposed) distance. If a legitimate relationship occurs with a fear, then the mind has much more clarity and energy to perceive with (and “as”) order and integrity. Most people have tension with their fears, involving conflict, friction, and avoidance; they look at “their” fears with images of distance and separation; many feel the more distance and separation… the better. Fear is only really diminished and solved when it is understood in a precise, legitimate relationship… not when there is needless friction, separation, strife, struggling, tug-of-war tension, and piecemeal analysis of fear. Analysis of fear involves — and is — time. A precise relationship with fear is not something that requires time or uncovering. If there is a precise, legitimate relationship (i.e., intelligent relationship) with fear there may be no need for time and duration (which is what analysis is) to better understand it (i.e., fear) in the future. If the future’s perspective (even with loads and loads of analysis having occurred) on fear still involves separation and conflict (as it does when the analyzer is supposedly different from the analyzed), it will not have understood fear to any profound degree; there is no more ideal moment to delve into it and understand the depth of it than when it actually takes place. Analyzing it later involves distance; most people look at fears through (and “as”) distance; such separation is of conflict/friction, and does not deeply flower into profound understanding and immense insight. Fear requires time for its existence. Without time, fear is not. Employing analysis and time to deal with fear may not be the most prudent thing to do.
What you say is good advice I heard once before. You have to experience the psychological fear and examine it – at the time. Apparently it works.
And lovely rose buds. So many about to burst forth 🙂
Thank you, Sci! 🙂 Yes, not only examine it but have a proper relationship with it, which means no separative distance such as with time (or learned space from a centered ego).
True 🙂
Well said.
Fear has its reasons, staying in the observer, instead of avoidance, removes the boogie man from fear, thus leaving room for insight.
Lovely photo.
Thanks, Genie! 🙂 Sometimes fear is rational; oftentimes it is not and is of distortion. An observer thinking that he or she is separate from it — controlling it with and from internal distance — only extends the distortion.
The best way is to fight against fears. If you have fear of heigth, go with the elevator 100 times a day, then you will loose it. If you want to hunt tigers, go where the tigers are, an old Chinese proverbs.
In a small way, yes. But that elevator technique has its ups and downs. 🙂 However, we are talking about how the mind can go beyond all this time-process energy expenditure… which is largely wasteful. You don’t have the fear of height; the fear of height is what you are (at the time). If the mind fights against what it is… friction and conflict are what ensues and that doesn’t result in a mind that can resolve all fears without friction and conflict; friction and conflict are a waste of energy.
Dry as a bone here still, Mitza. No rain in sight!
I don’t know if that’s the right way for everybody. I’m suffering from social phobia and I’m forcing myself to go out and face persons that I really don’t feel like seeing. If I wouldn’t do it, I had to stay in bed for the rest of my life and hide. And believe me, every time I succeeded to cope with the situation I feel a bit stronger and am proud of myself.
I could send you a lot of rain from here. Just some days ago we had very heavy rains, all the strawberries, cherries etc. are going bad, and it’s still quite cold here whilst in Greece they have a heatwave. You can only choose between the devil and the Beelzebub, Thomas. Regards Mitza
Ah, what i am suggesting is to (in the case of social apprehensions) socialize as if those fears don’t exist. Yes, you can go out and socialize. If you go out just to conquer the fears, you are still fighting them; there is then conflict and inner tension. If you go out to socialize — fear or no fears, it doesn’t matter — that’s another story. If you go out to socialize and they do exist, then be them without any judgment, condemnation, or distance. Then, the fears lose their power over you because, with or without them, it is OK and is what actually is. So yes, you don’t go into a shell and hide… and you don’t hide from (try to expose) or look negatively regarding the fears either. 🙂
Very nice
Thank you, Joke! 🙂 Much appreciated!
from here,
i am fearing not
those flowery words 🙂
🙂 One hopes not!
Reblogged this on Lady Dyanna.
Thank you much for the reblog! I’m very appreciative! 🙂
I love the texture on those flowers.
Yes, Karen… so do i! They seem to have an extra fuzziness! 🙂
Great post, Tom. Very timely! Thanks
Thank you, Jean! 🙂 I sure hope it helps some of us.
Love the colors, so beautiful Tom! Great macro! 🙂
Thank you, Marcela! 🙂 It was windy that day and it was tough to photograph them.
Beautiful picture Tom.
Thank you, Sonya! 🙂
Love the picture Tom. Hope always unfolds.
Thanks much and you are not ordinary! 🙂